I want to dissolve in bitter tears .... I want the sweetness of the white clouds ... clearing my gray days ..... I wanted to be able to fight against my internal violence ... but it's late ... I can not feel it anymore The warmth of loving arms ... I no longer want to smile with friends in bars at night ..... I want to lie in a dark room and let life for me pass .. without me seeing her .... . I want the complete oblivion of the sunny days ..... of the wishes I have created in my hallucinatory moments ... just the cigarette company killing me slowly ... the devil lurking in the corner ... smiling every now and then .. .me waiting ... my hell is worse than burning ... it's worse than imagining ... I want the coldness of the cruel stones closing my bed in the shadows of death ... I mean that I loved ... that I hated .... I stopped being something or someone .... just a story told badly, quickly forgotten .....